Mind tricks?

I know events from the past few days are having an effect on me. I know this because I have just had the biggest shock of my life, OK maybe not of my life but certainly of recent times. I was watching the Conservative conference, (aren’t politicians lovely cuddly little wankers?) when a certain amount of pressure on my inner bladder wall urged me to pay a visit. The rest of the family were elsewhere in the house, I don’t want this to appear as though I live in a huge mansion. No! Only a small three bedroom terraced Victorian property. Emma, Stevie, Dave, Jess and Jason were either in bed or doing important work for the world via their XBOXs (XBOXes?).

Lights were out and downstairs was very quiet indeed. I am very conscious, OK financially tight, with energy, and as such don’t like turning on lights unnecessarily. I’ve lived in this house for thirteen years and can walk around with my eyes shut, apart from the time with the smashed wine bottle and the blood, hospital etc. BUT I know my way around. In fact, I do find myself wandering around when the lights ARE off with my eyes closed and tonight I was doing exactly that.

As I write, it’s taken me some time to calm down, I am watching the BBC Horizon special, ‘The Death of the Oceans’ and my previous concern seems so insignificant in comparison but I will continue.

I opened the bathroom door, in our house the bathroom is downstairs due to the way the house was extended, with my eyes shut. It has not been particularly cold today nor warm, but when I opened the thin, interior, wooden door a blast of really, really cold air surprised me. It surprised me enough to open my eyes.

I faced a man, or a shadowy outline of a man. The weird thing was that even though I couldn’t focus physically on his features, or form, I was well aware of his face and emotion. He was very, very hostile and sneered with malevolent intent. I am over six foot tall (only just) and although running to fat I am quite muscular. I’m not trying to construct a dating site explanation of myself but to illustrate that I don’t generally, feel physically threatened. Here however, for a second, I was nothing; A two year old in the face of a psychopathic force of nature. I was helpless.

A moment later all was well, the temperature rose, the fear dissipated and I blinked to see my familiar bathroom. I turned the light on immediately!

In a time honoured means to question and query…WTF? The feelings remain and I am a bit shaken. Paranoia I am sure, is the explanation, but it only provides an illustration of how this whole sequence of events with the re-emergence of my old Navy buddy Simon is effecting me.

More later.